20
May
09

E3, sometimes the turtle beats the hare?

I haven’t posted in a bit so I figured we were due for somethin’ but really I don’t have anything specific to write about this time. I’ve been spending the last week gettin’ jazzed up for a wedding, playing Prince of Persia for 360 and fist bumping important people. Also like everyone else I saw Star Trek last week and must say it lived up to every expectation I had for it, especially Bones who was the best part. They definitely set a great footing to continue a new franchise series so I’m looking forward to that.

If there is one thing I’ll mention in this post I’d say it’s that for once I’m looking forward to E3. Usually theres much better lookin’ stuff coming up later in the year especially when my personal favorite Blizzcon isn’t until August and the Penny Arcade Expo has thoroughly stomped E3 in the past. This year could be different though as the hype is apparently working and I have a few things I definitely want to look out for.

The major one is of course Hideo Kojima’s announcement which has a sweet countdown site to tag along with it: http://www.konami.jp/kojima_pro/next/?ref=koji_pro_e

Of course we’re supposed to think it’s Metal Gear Solid 5 and I can only hope. Some people on these here internets have pointed out that it’s set to end during Microsofts press conference at E3 which could be a hint of something as well.

All I know is if Kojima is behind it, it’ll be great. It could be a pinball game but by Thor it’ll be the greatest pinball game you’ve ever played. I can’t say that I’ll automatically be disappointed if its not MGS 5 though, but dammit if it’s not you’re playing with my poor nanobot lovin, snake steerin’, gear stompin’ heart. Although I guess Pinball Siege: Death of the World Patriots could be just as good.

 

Another big announcement is coming from the Team Ico people who are making a new game for the PS3. Considering I don’t have a PS3 I can’t get THAT excited about this one but I can always hold John at knifepoint and force him to let me play his…you know a usual Saturday. “Hey, how are you enjoying THRICO?” “NOT VERY MUCH.” NE Ways (what the hell spellchecker thats not an infraction?) this here video is apparently footage from the new game which looks pretty epic if its the truth. If not consider me an evil rumormonger wandering the plagued woods selling cherries to the gullible townsfolk.

 

Another keypoint of the E3 experience for me is always what Square is doing. Most of the time it’s pretty mundane and really you don’t learn anything but sometiiiiimes they throw a curve ball at you like last years “biggest news of E3” that Final Fantasy 13 is going to the 360. This is tremendous news for me as I mentioned earlier I don’t have a ps3 and my good friend John does not enjoy roleplaying games unless theres space or hookers or spacehookers. Now that I think about it that probably goes for anything he enjoys but regardless I won’t have to hold him captive as he watches me slay faeries and ride dragons…or the other way around however it goes these days.

I have no idea what they have planned, probably a solid release date for FF13 in Japan or something, which would be pretty rad because we all know the formula for American Release dates:
J + (tt x F)(K+V)/E
Where J is the amount of time it takes to come out in Japan, tt is the time it takes to translate, F is the amount of fans you have for the game, K is the amount of seals killed per year in the arctic, V is the voice acting talent level and E is the amount of employees working on it.
So once we know that we’ll be in business. Either that or maybe a FF7 remake for 360 announcement. Please.

 

You know what else I like doing? Killin zombones. You know what game is gonna let me do just that…in a giant hamster ball? Dead Rising 2. Capcom is going to be highlighting some new information at their conference about it and I cannot wait. So far we’ve seen a dude who looks sorta like Jack Bauer going around Vegas on a motorcycle, wheelie-ing over the hordes of undead with reckless abandon.

FOURTEEN RED ZOMBIE COP

FOURTEEN RED ZOMBIE COP

I think that picture alone is probably going to lead me to attaining this game as quickly as possible. There’s not many things I always wanted to do in my life but one of them is crushing a zombie cop with a roulette wheel. Dreams can come true. Hey…thats not a bad idea for a post, “Things I want to do in my lifetime”, maybe I’ll work on that one for next time.

You know for a post I went in with nothing to talk about I came out pretty strong. I just Rachel Alexandra’d this bitch.

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